Not just because “sex sells.” It’s because we want to experience people—especially women—in their raw, unabashed sexual power. Strippers are skilled professionals at embodying this sexual goddess/god energy. It’s also safe to say that you might be here because you’re a little unsure of how to engage in this whole dirty talk thing. You might not want to say the wrong thing, or end up feeling embarrassed about not being able to do it well. We would never say these things to one another in any other context, and this is especially true if we’re verbally playing out our sexual fantasies. We’re turned on by the idea that we’re doing something “bad” or “naughty” and it’s totally healthy.
Dirty Talk Examples for Sexting.
As President Harry Truman once said, “Selfishness and greed cause most of our troubles.” He may not have been talking about the bedroom, but the same rule applies. Dr. Needle agrees that being selfless in the bedroom — and being vocal about your intent to bring your partner to orgasm — is almost a guaranteed turn on. As you bathe in the afterglow of a ravenous session, expand the sensuality with some post-sex dirty talk. This is where expressing that sexual goddess energy in little moments will make him feel both turned on and insanely grateful to have such an exciting and erotic woman. The easiest way to freestyle effective dirty talk is expressing what you like, what you want, and how turned on you are. As you do that, you get in the flow and feel even more turned on, which just ramps up the cycle.
- “Dirty talk can be a useful tool for bridging the gap between physical and emotional intimacy,” she tells Elite Daily.
- “It’s never a bad idea to incorporate more erotic language and communication into your sex life, especially now.”
- Dirty talk is part of the fantasy of sex, and fantasy doesn’t always translate perfectly to reality.
- We also decided who would initiate the conversation as it was somewhat uncomfortable for both of us at the beginning.
- Dirty talk is pretty intimidating when you’re worried about how you might sound or if your partner is going to laugh.
- We feel restricted, bored, and lack interest in each other.
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Guys are more singular in their focus, whereas women can hold many things in their mind at once when it comes to sexual arousal. This is especially crucial if your partner is a woman. Women, in particular, are often aroused through the imagination. This is why erotic books like 50 Shades of Gray are infamous smash hits among female readers.
Talking Dirty: What Your Lover Wants to Hear During Sex
Now that you’ve expanded your knowledge of erotic language, it’s time to get more personal and put yourself in the situation. “When something this catastrophic happens, it’s really disorienting how drastically your libido can change, and how you and your partner can suddenly be mismatched when it comes to sex drive,” says Horn. Right now, even couples that are sheltering in place together can also benefit from exploring or investing more into dirty talk, too. I can’t stop thinking about what you did to me last time. I’ve been thinking long and hard about what I’m going to do to you tonight.
Instead of diving right in, start sprinkling in some sexy talk here and there to get comfortable with it. From there, you can gauge what feels right for you and your partner. Instead, subtle compliments about the way that they look or about how you want to make intimate and slow love to them are as equally powerful at invigorating the sexual lust we seek. You know your partner well, so start with dirty talk that isn’t too aggressive and only build into more kinky forms of this once you have established that it is something your partner enjoys. Once you get a feel for the vibes, then it is up to you to choose how you wish to progress.
“Dirty talk can reveal fantasy material, which brings in the erotic imagination for both partners,” says Buehler. “Sharing this material can increase not only arousal, but intimacy and closeness as they learn more about each other’s sexual wants and needs,” she explains. These eight message themes fit into two higher order factors. These factors are individualist talk and mutualistic talk. Individual talk is a higher order of erotic talk themes that correlate more so to individual satisfaction, while mutualistic talk correlates more so to mutual satisfaction, namely a sexual partner’s satisfaction. If you’re a man looking for more ways to add some oomph to your sex life, you should check out Supercharge Your Sex Life.
This is definitely going to turn him on AND make him pound you harder. But what if you said it with a flat, disinterested tone like you had mentally checked out of the situation? If you’ve never engaged in dirty talk with your partner before, you may not know how they feel about it. Jennifer Litner, sexologist and founder of Embrace Sexual Wellness, says before you talk dirty to your partner, get their consent. If you’ve never engaged in dirty talk, it can feel uncomfortable and awkward.